Confession

Yesterday was hard.  I was just winding down from AJ's 2nd birthday party the day before, heading to church, when it hit me.  Our baby was due this month, but we lost the precious one back in September.  I had a really hard time holding it together during worship, but with my nieces on either side of me, I had to.  Back in September, I was sad, but I really trusted the Lord through everything.  My husband seemed to take it a lot harder.  However, until yesterday, what I struggled with the most since the miscarriage, trying everything we could for months on end, was that maybe that was my last chance, that maybe the Lord just doesn't see fit to bless us with another child.

I realize that I am definately not the only one who battles every day, trying to be faithful to the God of creation and trust completely in Him in this situation, knowing that I have an absolutely beautiful, sweet little girl! God didn't have to give me AJ, but He did, and I am so very thankful...But then I despair.  I am a wretched sinner!

Here is my worst confession...And I know with all of my heart that I am wrong, that God does NOT work this way: Like I mentioned about a week ago, I had broken down with SDK about my inability to keep my life organized.  I knew this shouldn't be such a big crazy deal!! Well, after many tears, I realized that deep inside, I thought if I could just prove to God that I could be a good, organized wife and mother, that maybe He would give me another child.

I know...So wrong, but this is very honest.  It is okay that I was sad to lose our baby, it was okay for me to be sad yesterday, but it is not okay for me to think my Lord can be bargained with! It is not okay to dwell on those around me who conceive just by thinking about it, and wonder why not me? Godly sorrow produces repentance without regret, but worldly sorrow produces death (2 Corinthians 7:10) And those thoughts were definately killing me! I'm sure I was grieving the Lord.

I will definately struggle...I know those days are not over, but hopefuly I will trust the Lord's will, no matter what it is, more and more every day!  And I will continue to better my home, not to barter with God, but out of love for my beautiful husband and daughter.

I'll Scratch your Back if you Scratch Mine!

OR...I'll help organize your closet if you help organize mine!  I just recently bought Real Simple magazine, an organizing edition (of course!), and it had this really cool idea!  Basically, they said to have a friend help you and you help them, then you go out and celebrate together!  It sounded great to me, but a closet is not what I need help with...more like my attic or my basement.  Who's coming over??

My Kitchen!

I found a website that has a plan to organize your kitchen in 5 hours. (See Organize Your Life page for the link) The basic plan is...

Hour 1: get rid of old unused food and stuff,
Hour 2: Clean out cupboards,
Hour 3: Put things where you need them,
Hour 4: Use counter space wisely,
Hour 5: Label the inside of your cupboards.

I definately spent 5 hours in my kitchen, but I did all that stuff to one cupboard at a time, except I haven't labeled anything...Overkill???

Before I show you my before and after pictures, I have some disclaimers. First, my kitchen is small and hard to work with.  Second, we have a crazy corner cupboard that no human being could reach the back of. Third, a lot of our space is wide open with no doors. Fourth, we have these crazy shallow cupboards that the first owners added in. Fifth, I added more food to some cupboards once I made space so it looks even worse to me! Here we go!

Corner Cupboards Before:

Corner Cupboards Cleaned out...Step 2:

Corner Cupboards After (added food)

Cupboards in Entry Before:

Cupboards in Entry After (what's the differrence???)

Fridge Area Before:

Fridge Area After (Mostly the top is like heaven!!):

Wall Space Before:

Wall Space After:

Our Bitsy Counter Space as Cleared as it Can Get!:

There it is...5 hours later. Now, do I need labels? Maybe for the hubby.  Do I need more containers? Maybe for my sanity...I just like them! What room next? Not sure...











My Home

Well, I spent about five hours yesterday sorting, cleaning, and organizing my kitchen.  I did this because I nearly broke down with my mom (I had already broke down a couple times with my poor husband).  I was telling her that I just can't do it!  I'm horrible at this!!!  But my dear mom says, "No you are not horrible at organizing, it's just that you don't have very much storage space!" This is very true.  We live in a two bedroom bungalow with tiny closets, tiny rooms, and a tiny kitchen.  We try our best to keep things organized.  I thought I'd show you some pics of the space we are dealing with, and then I'm going to show you before and after pictures of my kitchen! Aren't you all so lucky...:) Be kind!

Sorry some of them are sideways!  The blog page turned them on me and wouldn't let me fix it!

Dining Room:

A bit off our tinsy Bedroom on Valentines Day:

The Hallway: Sideways :(

AJ's Bedroom:

Family Room:

We try to disguise AJ's toys in baskets! Any suggestions??

Kitchen Table:

Bathroom:

So there it is! Next post I will show you the work I did in the kitchen.  





Working our Way Back

My best girlfriend was the first to view my blog, and she said something like, "I need to get organized first." Like, BEFORE she could organize her life.  I know exactly what she means.  I'm beginning to realize that my entire house needs to be revamped and labeled before the schedules I've made can make a difference.  I think this is why I still feel like I can't rest, and that my weekends are just as busy cleaning and working as my weekdays are!  I've been searching organization tips, and I see that I have to start at the bottom.  I'm going to start in the kitchen, since I spend a lot of time there!  While I am testing out a technique I found for the kitchen, I found a really great checklist for doing a very quick daily clean-up for your home that I will share!

Quick Daily Clean-Up

Rain Day!

I so wanted to take AJ to the Detroit Zoo today, but the weather is mucho gross!  I was prepared for a few showers, but it's a bit worse...Obviously the Lord knew my plans would be altered, so now I need to see how I can honor Him best with this extra time inside! Right now AJ is busy coloring with markers while she watches Blue's Clues. What can mama do??? 

Everything is pretty much under control on the main floor, so I think I will make my husband happy and focus on the basement today.  About a month ago he finished building me some storage shelves that, at this point, remain covered in saw dust!  Shot Vac, here I come!!! Some may think this is horrible, but I plan to set my beautiful little girl next to me in her Pack n' Play along with some books and toys.  We do not have one of those wonderful finished basements.  We have a basement basement, and it's not safe for toddlers to roam around in.

I sure hope it is nice later on, so we can go for a walk, or maybe the park.  By the way, if you live in Macomb County, MI, please check out George George Memorial Park.  It is so beautiful!  AJ and I have been there twice this week already! The park it so clean, with a perfect blend of play areas and nature.  They have some very nice bathrooms and a beautiful area to eat. 

What?!?! It is already clearing up...I better get busy.  That's Michigan for you!

Specific Weekend Schedule

I'm fairly certain I didn't get to any of my cook ahead stuff on Saturday because I haven't been planning my weekends. I mean, I write them on our calendar, but that has never seemed to help one such as myself! Of course it didn't help that I couldn't go anywhere, like the grocery store, as we only had one car...my husband narrowly escaped death when his brakes went out on I-75. Yikes!!! But I blame myself that I planned to cook ahead the same day we had a birthday party to attend, and a baptism and BBQ! What...Was...I...Thinking??? Apparently I thought I was super woman now that I have all these lovely schedules, but I guess I need one more! The Weekend Schedule! I realized last weekend that there was something wrong. Why was I still having to work so hard on the weekends, when my chore calendar CLEARLY was blank on Saturday and Sunday?

Well, don't ask me...I'm still trying to figure it out...